We went to Maputo today to get vaccinations at the MOZ PC HQ (heh,heh, abbreviations are fun) and see some sights. We got to walk around for a bit and go to the Natural History museum. While in there we made an interesting observation - everything in the museum is out in the open - models, specimens, stuffed animals, etc. And yet the museum obviously has children visiting quite often.
Children just have more respect in Mozambique (and maybe Africa as a whole?). Kids are taught from an early age to obey their parents, elders and guests. In my house, the children immediately do what they're told, without question. If I'm alone with a kid or two, they'll initiate conversation because they know me. But in a group of white people, the children only speak when spoken to and even then, it is minimal.
This isn't to say that the clear lines drawn between fathers and sons in Africa should be replicated in the USA, but I'm curious as to how respect is enforced. If there's one thing I've found, it's that mothers and children are the same all over the world. So what changes in how these kids are raised?
I don't hope (but assume) that corporal punishment is used. However, living in a communal society also helps - where everyone demonstrates respect, conformity ensues.
So in this society, a Natural History museum with open exhibits has few discipline issues.
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Food is often a topic of conversation here. We get fed more often than we go to the bathroom, which is quite often for some people. I eat a big morning breakfast of egg, bread and something else. Then we have a mid-morning snack break, then a long lunch break followed by a mid-afternoon snack break. You go home about 5:30 (when the sun starts to set) and are offered food immediately.
I've trained my family to only give me one meal per night. Some have three dinners in one night. We eat a lot. We learned how to say "enough" very quickly (chego).
Tonight, my family kept on feeding me, so instead of saying "enough", I decided to make the universal gesture for "I'm going to explode". I was very animated and so this made for a very good 5-minute laugh. We pretended to pick up pieces of me from all over the room. It was funny.
Everything's funny here. People live life with humor close to them at all times. I've found that my experience here has been tempered only by my willingness to make a complete ass out of myself. I'm the first to try or do a lot of things, and the Mozambican trainees have noticed this. I get picked on first for dancing, demonstrating a concept, etc. Everyone calls me "Joao" now and I respond to it immediately. For the first time, I've started referring to myself in the 3rd person, just because my name is so fun to say!
This isn't to say that nobody else takes the lead or participates, etc. It's just that the trainees always turn to me for a good laugh. Especially when I don't know what's going on.
By the same token, I've consciously taken leadership roles in training. And I can tell people look up to me, which is crazy as it's only 1 1/2 weeks in. I try not to outdo anything - in one minigroup session, my group of six wanted me to be the appointed leader, which I refused. I tried to get the shy one to do it, which failed, but someone who doesn't usually step up, did. Which I'm glad for.
This leadership thing seems to be quite natural for me at this point in my life. I've found out how to take charge without being tyrannical, pompous, controlling, stressed out, or intense. I think I just needed to learn the exact role of humor, which I have.
Of course, this begs questions. 1 - What do I do for the rest of my time here to improve myself, and 2 - Why am I here if I can leave at any time?
#2 is, ironically, the easy one. However much love I have for people in the States and however much I miss them is secondary to tangibly improving others' lives, and helping a desperate country. It's a long 2+ years, and I will miss out on life, but I will experience a life I've wanted desperately for quite a while now. I take things day by day, not year by year.
#1 - this is what training is for. I want to have a bunch of (MOM TALKING - I DON'T HAVE A CLUE WHAT WORD HE WROTE) projects to do that will really teach people what they need to know. I want to find inner peace. I want to improve myself - learn more about an agrarian lifestyle. Be self-sufficient. And I want to teach!
Back to the leadership. I received a compliment last night that I'm very diverse in my talents. It was a great, unsolicited compliment. She made it sound like I was the most diverse of the group (I hate the usage of "diverse"). This is a very talented bunch of people. It was amazing to hear this from both this young woman and another next to her. She also pointed out how good I am with kids. (This is all difficult to write, I hope you know!) I have a great time with kids, being one myself. That's all they want, is affirmationn that happiness is not a temporary condition.
I'm still seeking balance in my life, but I know that I've come a long way.
I think the second goal of PC needs to be toned down significantly. This goal has to do with spreading American culture, which is already pervasive. I think the only way PC gets bipartisan funding is by maintaining this clause and insisting on its execution. We'll see how much emphasis is placed on it.
I called my mother and Lisa today, for about a minute each. I called my mother for her sanity and Lisa for my own. Both calls went very well. I miss everyone so much. I need to find a better way to call.
Peace
John
