The full proposal is here: http://burro.astr.cwru.edu/cwrupet/proposal.txt
My favorite part:
3. Fish
Fish in containers of ten gallons or less are exempt from this policy.
Individual schools or management centers may adopt more restrictive
policies on fish.
I can see it now ...
Jeff was weary after a full day of classes. Taking a deep breath of stale, paint-peeling-off-the-walls air, he started towards the door.
"Just study a couple hours for physics, then work on my engineering homework. After that, I'll brush my teeth, feed the fish, then go to bed."
As his words echoed through the hall, he realized that everyone else's doors were closed. Not that this was strange, no, not for CWRU. It would have been odd if a couple doors were open or if he were closing the door so that he could shut out the noises of people busily socializing. Jeff felt his eyes glaze over from the woe of routine, partially questioning why he even bothered to lock up before studying.
"It's not like anyone's actually going to bother me."
Routine was what kept a CWRU student in school. Without their normal sequence of events, a Case kid would never make it. Not with endless work and studying to juggle with resume-building extracurriculars. As with many tough schools, a regular motto was "Sleep is for the weak." Jeff embodied it. Three hours of rest per night, but some would argue his fascination with fish provided more.
Jeff relished the moments he could drift away, pondering what world his fish lived in. He wondered about his own world and about what life after CWRU would be like. It was only after thoughts ran to schoolwork and responsibilities that the future seemed to look dark and ... normal.
Jeff deftly moved his hand down to the deadbolt, preparing for his evening study session. Before he was able to move the bolt, a strangely similar sound emanated from the door, twice in a row. Snapping out of it, Jeff realized it was just someone knocking.
"Mr. Simonds?"
The voice was strange, sounding much like a frog had developed human vocal cords.
"Jeff Simonds?"
Jeff thought that maybe someone had been accidentally let into the dorm, but then realized that a stranger would never know his name.
"Yes, I'm Jeff," he said as he opened the door.
"Hi, my name is Phillip, I'm from Maintenance. I hate to do this to you, but I've heard that you have a very large fish tank."
"Yeah, I guess it's pretty big. It doesn't leave very much room for doing anything other than sleeping, but ... wait, why do you care?"
"Well, you see, there's a, um, regulation."
Phillip said the last word as to make sure Jeff knew this was not a word in Phillip's normal vocabulary. Phillip continued,
"All tanks have to be ten gallons or less. I'm afraid I'm going to have to drain your tank to find out how large -- "
"That's absurd! Don't you realize that you can just measure the height, width and depth to figure out how many gallons it can hold?"
"I don't, well, you see, I have these steps I need to follow."
"Says who?"
Phillip handed Jeff a worn piece of paper, detailing the "regulation" accompanied by a fresh signature.
"Shit."
-----
Jeff stood up and headed towards his door. He did this every night, it seemed, but he knew it was the only way to survive. As he locked the door behind him, Jeff looked out to the desk on the other side of the room that was faded except for a two-by-two-foot square in the middle. He had been sleeping well, but doing poorly in class. He sighed, and thought,
"I should have stuck with the eight-gallon tank."
