I spent four hours today and four-plus yesterday making the schedule for 22 classrooms, encompassing about 1200 students and 30 teachers. It was a fun logic puzzle, but as logic puzzles are hard to do with other people asking why you're making every move and staring at you the whole time, it was tiring.
But that's been the crux of the work this week. And now I know I have 6 turmas, about 330 students, of 10th grade Biology. I'm giving them exam preparation, I am the chief of Biology during the day session, I will be the director of one of those 6 turmas, and more importantly, none (repeat: NONE) of this is written in stone. I couldn't have asked for a better schedule and responsibilities, but it will most likely change.
I think the journal writing has fallen off lately due to a combination of factors. One is that nothing that new is going on (this is the second time around, after all), I have better outlets for stress relief and casual conversation, and I'm not taking a drug that makes me hyper-emotional. Other than that...
The kids have been overly obnoxious as of late, but I'm keeping that in check with being overly strict. They stole the handle to our outside tap, rendering it practically useless. I have little hope of getting it back, but here's hoping.
Changana is getting going again with Alfredo's lessons to Nanosh. Now he starts to initiate Changana conversations that I finish off. It'll be really fun when we end up speaking to each other in Changana - what a cool secret language to have.
I'm planning on giving my 10th graders quite a bit of work to do, mainly because I know they are capable of so much. Annie and I discussed a partnership between Vukoxa and some of my students where they volunteer their time to help out elderly caretakers who are unable to do certain things like cook, etc. I'm also going to try and get them to plant and take care of some donated plants at school. In addition, every trimester they'll have a small group project teaching the rest of their turma one subject that is necessary to know for the exams. Hopefully, this will make exam studying that much easier.
Peace
John
Saturday, February 07, 2004
1/15/2004
I sat down with Laurenco today to try and start working on the school schedule. He made a list of the teachers and seemed to realize for the first time that we're not going to have enough teachers for the students. Almost 2000 students and about 30 teachers.
The neighborhood kids have really been bothering me - annoying us at any given opportunity, without rest. I think it gets to me because they have nothing else to do all day and all night than to play and make noise outside of our house. What's wrong with this picture when thousands of Mozambicans are starving and dying of AIDS, but these healthy, able-bodied kids are doing nothing 90% of the time? And the NGOs and other aid organizations (including Peace Corps) are busy about 50% of the time? What's the message we're sending here?
Peace
John
The neighborhood kids have really been bothering me - annoying us at any given opportunity, without rest. I think it gets to me because they have nothing else to do all day and all night than to play and make noise outside of our house. What's wrong with this picture when thousands of Mozambicans are starving and dying of AIDS, but these healthy, able-bodied kids are doing nothing 90% of the time? And the NGOs and other aid organizations (including Peace Corps) are busy about 50% of the time? What's the message we're sending here?
Peace
John
1/14/2004
You know, making lists of students can be very exciting. Not.
I took a nice walk today and got lots of ideas of what to do with 10th grade classes, if I end up teaching them. And if I do, I'd most likely end up with 9 turmas, which is not a trivial amount. I would be teaching from 7 AM to 12:15 PM every day, and would have to grade about 450 papers. A challenge.
Peace
John
I took a nice walk today and got lots of ideas of what to do with 10th grade classes, if I end up teaching them. And if I do, I'd most likely end up with 9 turmas, which is not a trivial amount. I would be teaching from 7 AM to 12:15 PM every day, and would have to grade about 450 papers. A challenge.
Peace
John
1/13/2004
What's it like to be hot, all the time? You constantly drink water and feel thirsty afterward, watching the sweat bead up on unexpected places like the back of your hand, and never feel like you need to go to the bathroom. You wear as little clothing as possible, bathe two or three times a day just to feel normal, and seek out even the slightest breeze. You stick to anything and everything, avoid putting your hand on the paper you're writing and the couch you're sitting on. You dream of air conditioning, ice cold sodas, ice cream, and winter. You go to bed, soak the sheets, then wake up and already feel drained. You speak and sweat more; you move and sweat more. You do stupid things like complain about the heat and forget what day it is. You find dozens of cockroaches, flies, mosquitoes, and all other manner of beasts. At noon, everything is asleep for two hours.
Peace
John
Peace
John
1/12/2004
Who says you can't make New Year's resolutions a couple of weeks late? On the first day of the second year of school, I'm resolving to let fewer things piss me off. Specifically, those things that are simply cultural difference or frustrations that I should expect, given the circumstances. For instance, I've been sitting here for an hour and a half, doing nothing, not because there's no work to do, but because we don't know WHAT to do. I'm not angry. It's actually pretty funny. The only thing I'm worried about right now is what I'm going to teach this year, which is very much up in the air. And I'm trying to consider and make peace with every possibility so I don't get needlessly frustrated when it isn't what I wanted or expected.
I could probably sit here and write for hours, but I would start to bore myself and everyone else - an accurate reflection of my current state.
Some papers got mailed to me, and in them were a lot of variously-themed blurbs. Honor rolls, passages, obituaries, weddings, etc. Even my college's had a blurb about me going into Peace Corps. All of these blurbs are as short as possible, starting off with the relevant names and getting through the required information as quickly as possible. It's enough to make you think you really know this person and for a moment, have examined their entire life.
Especially the obits.
I never want an obituary - I say never, because people get repeat obits after 20, 50 years. I don't want people to think they can know me, that they can get a handle on who I am, from 4 sentences...or even 40. If they have to ask around and get to know others who knew me, then maybe they will feel for a few minutes what my life was like. And I feel this same way about everyone else.
I feel cheated when I read an obituary, like seeing a picture of a sunset and being told, "Now you know what Africa is like." I want to know what mistakes this person made, when their lowest moment was, what made them truly happy, what was their biggest regret...and not in a summary, but I want to know why.
Moreover, I want to avoid the trap of normalcy that so many Americans seem to just fall into. Not like that's going to happen...
Peace
John
I could probably sit here and write for hours, but I would start to bore myself and everyone else - an accurate reflection of my current state.
Some papers got mailed to me, and in them were a lot of variously-themed blurbs. Honor rolls, passages, obituaries, weddings, etc. Even my college's had a blurb about me going into Peace Corps. All of these blurbs are as short as possible, starting off with the relevant names and getting through the required information as quickly as possible. It's enough to make you think you really know this person and for a moment, have examined their entire life.
Especially the obits.
I never want an obituary - I say never, because people get repeat obits after 20, 50 years. I don't want people to think they can know me, that they can get a handle on who I am, from 4 sentences...or even 40. If they have to ask around and get to know others who knew me, then maybe they will feel for a few minutes what my life was like. And I feel this same way about everyone else.
I feel cheated when I read an obituary, like seeing a picture of a sunset and being told, "Now you know what Africa is like." I want to know what mistakes this person made, when their lowest moment was, what made them truly happy, what was their biggest regret...and not in a summary, but I want to know why.
Moreover, I want to avoid the trap of normalcy that so many Americans seem to just fall into. Not like that's going to happen...
Peace
John
1/11/2004
It's nice to be back in my house after living out of a small backpack for a week. Nice to have clean clothes, space and relative privacy!
So Zach, his parents and I went to Maputo on Wednesday to go for my physical and to tour Maputo a bit. We went out to the fish market, which is notable as a) before arriving in Mozambique, I ate approximately two fish in my life, and b) Not so long ago I was a vegetarian. More notable is that it was a great parent experience - seeing some borrowed but well-adapted culture in action.
The fish market is bustling, relatively speaking. There were dozens of banks, most of them empty at any given moment of the day, featuring shrimp, crabs, cod, sardines, clams and various others with attending women shouting in English and Portguese. The shrimp, from what I'm told, are very large and belie the name "shrimp". So we bought a kilogram for about $4 (approximately $2 a pound) and paid a bartender $2 to cook it and serve it with fries. All told, an excellent meal.
All in all, it seems that Zach's parents had a great time and enjoyed the new perspectives on African culture and Peace Corps culture that everyone gave them. Nothing radically surprising, and a great vacation.
On Friday after we had seen them off, I went back to Peace Corps for my follow-up physical. (Note: I usually don't like to talk about internal PC issues here, but I feel this is necessary and relevant to some current movements underway.) I had refused to sign an acknowledgement statement saying that I had read a warning about the anti-malarial medication, Lariam, that many of us take. We had been previously warned of its hallucinogenic and mood-depressing properties, but not as strongly as in this warning. Simply stated, the manufacturers knew that people taking Lariam had committed suicide, but did NOT know if Lariam had played any part. So I asked our medical officer about this, and he said that nobody with psychiatric histories is taking Lariam. I piped up that I do have a history (mild depression) and that I'm taking it. He reacted sharply, saying that I shouldn't be taking it. Apparently only people with a history of mental illness have committed suicide while taking Lariam. Suddenly, after a year, I was in a very high-risk category.
Well, I knew before that it wasn't helping, but I didn't know it could be THAT bad. I'll find out in about a month when it works itself out of my system and I'm regularly on another drug. I'm pretty sure, however, that it contributed to how difficult my first year was, or seemed to be.
And now I can't wait to teach again. I'm hoping it's 10th grade. I don't know what I'll do if it isn't, honestly, and I have fewer students, so that I can get to know them better. I remember meeting some of my own students last year who didn't even know, after classes were over. How can I evaluate them if I can't get to know them?
Peace
John
So Zach, his parents and I went to Maputo on Wednesday to go for my physical and to tour Maputo a bit. We went out to the fish market, which is notable as a) before arriving in Mozambique, I ate approximately two fish in my life, and b) Not so long ago I was a vegetarian. More notable is that it was a great parent experience - seeing some borrowed but well-adapted culture in action.
The fish market is bustling, relatively speaking. There were dozens of banks, most of them empty at any given moment of the day, featuring shrimp, crabs, cod, sardines, clams and various others with attending women shouting in English and Portguese. The shrimp, from what I'm told, are very large and belie the name "shrimp". So we bought a kilogram for about $4 (approximately $2 a pound) and paid a bartender $2 to cook it and serve it with fries. All told, an excellent meal.
All in all, it seems that Zach's parents had a great time and enjoyed the new perspectives on African culture and Peace Corps culture that everyone gave them. Nothing radically surprising, and a great vacation.
On Friday after we had seen them off, I went back to Peace Corps for my follow-up physical. (Note: I usually don't like to talk about internal PC issues here, but I feel this is necessary and relevant to some current movements underway.) I had refused to sign an acknowledgement statement saying that I had read a warning about the anti-malarial medication, Lariam, that many of us take. We had been previously warned of its hallucinogenic and mood-depressing properties, but not as strongly as in this warning. Simply stated, the manufacturers knew that people taking Lariam had committed suicide, but did NOT know if Lariam had played any part. So I asked our medical officer about this, and he said that nobody with psychiatric histories is taking Lariam. I piped up that I do have a history (mild depression) and that I'm taking it. He reacted sharply, saying that I shouldn't be taking it. Apparently only people with a history of mental illness have committed suicide while taking Lariam. Suddenly, after a year, I was in a very high-risk category.
Well, I knew before that it wasn't helping, but I didn't know it could be THAT bad. I'll find out in about a month when it works itself out of my system and I'm regularly on another drug. I'm pretty sure, however, that it contributed to how difficult my first year was, or seemed to be.
And now I can't wait to teach again. I'm hoping it's 10th grade. I don't know what I'll do if it isn't, honestly, and I have fewer students, so that I can get to know them better. I remember meeting some of my own students last year who didn't even know, after classes were over. How can I evaluate them if I can't get to know them?
Peace
John
1/04/2004
I worked with Nanosh this evening on what the heck he was going to teach for his first classes - which he wasn't expecting to give until next week.
But how do you introduce yourself as a teacher? I was disillusioned last year - or misinformed - and thought that the students wanted to hear all about my education and how hard I had worked. How horribly I knew African culture, specifically Mozambique. My students just wanted to know who I was, not what I had done. How old I am, brothers, sisters, other family, where I'm from, what food I like to eat, if I cook for myself, etc. And I never presented my students with a person; they had to discover me, little by little. I'll have some of the same students this year (unless I only have 8th grade), but for the new ones, I need to decide how to strike a balance between human informalities and strict rule-setting for the year.
Nanosh is allowing the students to come up with some class rules, too, so we'll see how that goes. Could be a really good idea, or could just be mediocre. That seems to be the general results of any experiment in the classroom. The key seems to be just to keep on trying while realizing that your experience isn't necessarily indicative of what other situations - class sizes, times of day, subject material - may manifest.
This year, I'm planning on basing 50% of my students' grades on testing (most teachers: 100%) and the other 50% as a combination of behavior, absences, homework grades, group-work grades, and a year-long project to help end-of-year exam studies. In order to alleviate homework grading, I'm going to assign it every day, but only randomly collect 5 students' assignments every day. We'll see, like everything else.
I find I've been talking about Phi Kap (my college fraternity) quite a bit lately. I learned so much in my experience there, about working with other people, working toward common, abstract goals, conflict resolution, humor, friendships and selflessness. It's unfortunate that people hear the word "fraternity" and have very different thoughts. In the same vein, "Peace Corps" has a very different connotation than reality.
Peace
John
But how do you introduce yourself as a teacher? I was disillusioned last year - or misinformed - and thought that the students wanted to hear all about my education and how hard I had worked. How horribly I knew African culture, specifically Mozambique. My students just wanted to know who I was, not what I had done. How old I am, brothers, sisters, other family, where I'm from, what food I like to eat, if I cook for myself, etc. And I never presented my students with a person; they had to discover me, little by little. I'll have some of the same students this year (unless I only have 8th grade), but for the new ones, I need to decide how to strike a balance between human informalities and strict rule-setting for the year.
Nanosh is allowing the students to come up with some class rules, too, so we'll see how that goes. Could be a really good idea, or could just be mediocre. That seems to be the general results of any experiment in the classroom. The key seems to be just to keep on trying while realizing that your experience isn't necessarily indicative of what other situations - class sizes, times of day, subject material - may manifest.
This year, I'm planning on basing 50% of my students' grades on testing (most teachers: 100%) and the other 50% as a combination of behavior, absences, homework grades, group-work grades, and a year-long project to help end-of-year exam studies. In order to alleviate homework grading, I'm going to assign it every day, but only randomly collect 5 students' assignments every day. We'll see, like everything else.
I find I've been talking about Phi Kap (my college fraternity) quite a bit lately. I learned so much in my experience there, about working with other people, working toward common, abstract goals, conflict resolution, humor, friendships and selflessness. It's unfortunate that people hear the word "fraternity" and have very different thoughts. In the same vein, "Peace Corps" has a very different connotation than reality.
Peace
John
1/03/2004
I'm anxious to start teaching again. I'm planning things out in my head, but as I do that, I know it's useless because everything will change. Let's see: 36 weeks of classes, minus 3 weeks for ACPs, 6 weeks when students won't show up, 3 weeks for holidays, and 3 weeks when I'll be off doing something else and that's about 21 weeks of school. And I could be teaching one or more of 8th, 9th or 10th grade, during the morning, evening or afternoon. I might have 6 turmas or 10 turmas, 300 or 500 students. I'll most likely be teaching Biology. I might have a day off every week. And all this begins in two weeks.
Every day I try and make sense of the world I've ended up in, and every day it feels like I'm waking up for the first time. I realize I'm in my bed in my room in my house in this town in Mozambique in Africa on the opposite side of the equator on the other side of the world from where I woke up the previous 24 years. And my mind climbs from that safe little place where it was so used to being, down along a tightrope surrounded by fiery pits of risk and failure, across to the other side where there's another safe little place. I truly feel like I've found that gain, and so I'm not putting as much on the line every day. At the same time, waking up into a safe little place might mean that I can actually teach this year, instead of being worried about crossing that tightrope.
Or maybe I should be realizing that this is the safest I'll be, right now, in this moment, with nothing to do and relaxed, and that I'll have to come down from this very soon in order to cross that tightrope again at the end of the year.
Peace
John
Every day I try and make sense of the world I've ended up in, and every day it feels like I'm waking up for the first time. I realize I'm in my bed in my room in my house in this town in Mozambique in Africa on the opposite side of the equator on the other side of the world from where I woke up the previous 24 years. And my mind climbs from that safe little place where it was so used to being, down along a tightrope surrounded by fiery pits of risk and failure, across to the other side where there's another safe little place. I truly feel like I've found that gain, and so I'm not putting as much on the line every day. At the same time, waking up into a safe little place might mean that I can actually teach this year, instead of being worried about crossing that tightrope.
Or maybe I should be realizing that this is the safest I'll be, right now, in this moment, with nothing to do and relaxed, and that I'll have to come down from this very soon in order to cross that tightrope again at the end of the year.
Peace
John
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)