Last night, we hit the local bars, and Jesse and I got very drunk. It was a good time, meeting a local by the name of Chipeto who insisted his girlfriend's name was Chipeta and offered my wine. The latrine was a large tree, and they put on a blues CD, repeating it four times. None of this was strange or difficult to adjust to at this point.
I typed up the first 6 HIV/AIDS lessons and I think quite a few volunteers are going to try and give them in some capacity. We had an excellent HIV/AIDS presentation today, getting lots of wonderful statistics - however disturbing. I live in one of the hotspots for HIV in Mozambique, so I'm definitely motivated.
It's been a little surreal, being back in this training situation - there are a ton of stories to share, people to comfort, and people to confide in. I think a few more in our group will be leaving soon - if these next couple of days don't go well. Sometimes the challenges are bigger than the opportunities and the situation is never right to continue.
But there's still a ton I can do here - I don't know if I can keep up this pace for another year and a half, but I want to try.
And the more I dip my hands into, the more overwhelmed I feel. So many people have such great ideas and I want to try it all...teaching English on the side, having office hours, coaching sports teams, etc.
Eh pa!
Peace
John
Saturday, May 31, 2003
4/20/2003
Friday was a good time, going out to the club in town, seeing the "big guy" dance as much as possible (6'5", 290), then ask me to dance, then hugging me...coming back at 3 AM to pack for the weekend...waking up at 6 AM to get on a 7 AM bus for Maputo on Saturday...getting into Maputo at 12:30....that night going clubbing at 11:00 PM to three hot "spots" in Maputo...falling asleep standing up at the last one, getting home at 5:00 AM...getting up at 7:30 AM because my body said so...traveling to B--- to see my host family. Then grabbing dinner and a beer until I couldn't stay awake at the bar.
HI! 10:00 in the evening on Easter Sunday. I remember Friday, but it all seems like one long day.
Peace
John
HI! 10:00 in the evening on Easter Sunday. I remember Friday, but it all seems like one long day.
Peace
John
4/17/2003
The night sky has been ridiculously gorgeous this week.
Two nights ago, there was a nearly complete moon shining down on a pleasantly cool earth. The air was still, though not with anticipation. It felt like summer had just given up and now winter didn't quite know what to do. This bizarre handover was reflected in the three delicate wisps of clouds remaining in the sky. My gaze was transfixed because I couldn't believe that nobody had deliberately placed them up above - small little scarves across the illuminated darkness.
And these three guards of the lonely season were lit from behind by the eternal watchman. The secondhand sunlight gave these three top billing and their presence was much more notable than had they been among their normal crowd. It was as if they knew their own beauty and bathed in it, to the delight of everyone watching.
I thought of the wonderful sunrises, moonrises, cloudless skies, threatening skies and electrical storms I've seen in the last 6 1/2 months. All of them are spectacular, not because the skies are different here, but because they're completely unfettered by technology and have little competition with TV, computers and movies. It almost seems that the sky becomes more beautiful because it knows it's being admired.
Peace
John
Two nights ago, there was a nearly complete moon shining down on a pleasantly cool earth. The air was still, though not with anticipation. It felt like summer had just given up and now winter didn't quite know what to do. This bizarre handover was reflected in the three delicate wisps of clouds remaining in the sky. My gaze was transfixed because I couldn't believe that nobody had deliberately placed them up above - small little scarves across the illuminated darkness.
And these three guards of the lonely season were lit from behind by the eternal watchman. The secondhand sunlight gave these three top billing and their presence was much more notable than had they been among their normal crowd. It was as if they knew their own beauty and bathed in it, to the delight of everyone watching.
I thought of the wonderful sunrises, moonrises, cloudless skies, threatening skies and electrical storms I've seen in the last 6 1/2 months. All of them are spectacular, not because the skies are different here, but because they're completely unfettered by technology and have little competition with TV, computers and movies. It almost seems that the sky becomes more beautiful because it knows it's being admired.
Peace
John
4/16/2003
Went to Alfredo's sister's funeral tonight. She died of AIDS at the local hospital (THE hospital) and this was the third night of the mourning. But that's making it sound like it was all tears.
People sang and talked and laughed, the family entertained many friends and others, and by the end of the night, when we said goodbye at the Canadians' house, I had forgotten why we had ventured out in the first place. Not to say that the dead are forgotten, but death is dealt with much more smoothly than in the West. And with more food. In this case, goat made it into the bean stew which I ended up eating. We'll find out in about 3-4 hours whether or not my body can handle it.
And the service wasn't that run-of-the-mill either. We were in a covered area behind the family's house, men seated in chairs facing the capulana-bandana'ed women seated on reed mats on the ground. A priest gave a brief Changana service, accompanied by Changana songs that spoke of the "spirit" that is so central to their lives, that it's synonymous with "wind".
I still maintain that I want my funeral to be the biggest party possible, catering to the tastes of as many as possible. Screw something meaningful, spiritual, or deep - there's nothing like a good time to remember someone by.
Mozambicans have a pretty good head start on this one...
Peace
John
People sang and talked and laughed, the family entertained many friends and others, and by the end of the night, when we said goodbye at the Canadians' house, I had forgotten why we had ventured out in the first place. Not to say that the dead are forgotten, but death is dealt with much more smoothly than in the West. And with more food. In this case, goat made it into the bean stew which I ended up eating. We'll find out in about 3-4 hours whether or not my body can handle it.
And the service wasn't that run-of-the-mill either. We were in a covered area behind the family's house, men seated in chairs facing the capulana-bandana'ed women seated on reed mats on the ground. A priest gave a brief Changana service, accompanied by Changana songs that spoke of the "spirit" that is so central to their lives, that it's synonymous with "wind".
I still maintain that I want my funeral to be the biggest party possible, catering to the tastes of as many as possible. Screw something meaningful, spiritual, or deep - there's nothing like a good time to remember someone by.
Mozambicans have a pretty good head start on this one...
Peace
John
4/15/2003
This analogy between the idea of God and a preemptive strike, just clarified things for me - for a split second. Some people are afraid of their God. Some people are afraid of countries or people who can - theoretically - harm them. These people tend to be the same. But there's no direct evidence - it's all faith. And so it makes a lot of sense to me that people who have a lot of religion in their lives can also be the ones who believe in this threat.
I've been trying to find a good analogy for how language works around here and I think I'm onto one. When someone speaks a 2nd language (learned in adulthood), they put on a form-fitting mask that covers their native tongue with different words and syntax. But they still think the same way, which can be a radically different manner from culture to culture. So my Portuguese mask which is pretty bare-boned, and their Portuguese masks are fitting over two different faces. While we may say the same words in the same order, our ways of thinking have not totally changed and there's still a language barrier. It's not until I've really delved into Changana and other cultural aspects that I'll have a bettr understanding of the Portuguese. Sure, I may be able to understand and speak it, but why do people say certain things at certain moments?
Peace
John
I've been trying to find a good analogy for how language works around here and I think I'm onto one. When someone speaks a 2nd language (learned in adulthood), they put on a form-fitting mask that covers their native tongue with different words and syntax. But they still think the same way, which can be a radically different manner from culture to culture. So my Portuguese mask which is pretty bare-boned, and their Portuguese masks are fitting over two different faces. While we may say the same words in the same order, our ways of thinking have not totally changed and there's still a language barrier. It's not until I've really delved into Changana and other cultural aspects that I'll have a bettr understanding of the Portuguese. Sure, I may be able to understand and speak it, but why do people say certain things at certain moments?
Peace
John
4/14/2003
It's been a few days.
Saturday there was a teacher's meeting at my school to plan out how the trimester grades were going to be handled and to recap what went well and not so well. Every subject had a report, and the directors all made reports afterwards. It was a pretty standard meeting.
Directly after the meeting, though feeling some nausea and loss of appetite, I headed off to a site near the coast in a very rural area. Phillip, one of the volunteers there, is making the video for bicycle maintenance and safety. We did some shooting, including some stunt work, and hung out for a bit in a very quiet and lush area of Mozambique. It seemed like a different world from where I've been living.
In fact, it seemed a lot closer to the image I had of Peace Corps - living without water or electricity, teaching at an old dilapidated school that kids have to travel great distance to get to...but this isn't to say I don't like my site. Having the creature comforts comes along with living in a busy city where opportunities come and go every hour and anonymity is slightly more possible. What you do as a volunteer depends upon your circumstances as much as your desire and motivation.
So I caught a chapa back to site on Sunday after looking for a lift for about 20 minutes. It was worth the wait as this was one of the most comfortable chapas (it resembled its original state) I've ever been in. I didn't even fall asleep because I wanted to enjoy my relative luxury. That and there was still a creeping nausea in my stomach that hadn't entirely gone away.
When I got back here, I flopped down on the couch (a two-seater) and stayed there for a couple hours, until I prayed to the porcelain god. Not feeling much better, my other end spoke for the rest of the night, alotting only a few hours of sleep before taking care of grades this morning. All told, I've had an egg sandwich, some biscuits and four liters of Gatorade/water in the last 28 hours.
I'm actually looking forward to being sick in the States. Not only will it be infinitely more comfortable, but my immune system is being exposed to such a spectrum of illnesses, American diseases will be cake.
And since I brought back peanut butter that Phillip's embrogada (maid) makes, I think I'm going to try a PB sandwich. It's actually somewhat appetizing.
It's hard to justify the important of teaching the difference between HIV and AIDS to people here. Health professionals here are 100% behind me and understand exactly why, but it's not obvious or even clear to most people.
The way the HIV/AIDS epidemic started here in sub-Saharan Africa, the conventional wisdom was that something - anything - needed to be done, fast. Which was and is true. And all that was done was helpful to some extent, but to turn the tables on the epidemic, the approach needs to be changed slightly.
The successful HIV/AIDS programs focus on understanding of the problem and why it needed to be avoided. There are many people here who can tell you that they need to use condoms, sterilized needles and new razor blades, but couldn't necessarily tell you what these things mean.
And so they have the information memorized, but have never been presented with applying it.
If you teach the difference between HIV and AIDS, they begin to see what's going on inside your body and how HIV gets in. It's the missing piece of the puzzle, and sets up the rest of the information you can present on the topic.
Peace
John
Saturday there was a teacher's meeting at my school to plan out how the trimester grades were going to be handled and to recap what went well and not so well. Every subject had a report, and the directors all made reports afterwards. It was a pretty standard meeting.
Directly after the meeting, though feeling some nausea and loss of appetite, I headed off to a site near the coast in a very rural area. Phillip, one of the volunteers there, is making the video for bicycle maintenance and safety. We did some shooting, including some stunt work, and hung out for a bit in a very quiet and lush area of Mozambique. It seemed like a different world from where I've been living.
In fact, it seemed a lot closer to the image I had of Peace Corps - living without water or electricity, teaching at an old dilapidated school that kids have to travel great distance to get to...but this isn't to say I don't like my site. Having the creature comforts comes along with living in a busy city where opportunities come and go every hour and anonymity is slightly more possible. What you do as a volunteer depends upon your circumstances as much as your desire and motivation.
So I caught a chapa back to site on Sunday after looking for a lift for about 20 minutes. It was worth the wait as this was one of the most comfortable chapas (it resembled its original state) I've ever been in. I didn't even fall asleep because I wanted to enjoy my relative luxury. That and there was still a creeping nausea in my stomach that hadn't entirely gone away.
When I got back here, I flopped down on the couch (a two-seater) and stayed there for a couple hours, until I prayed to the porcelain god. Not feeling much better, my other end spoke for the rest of the night, alotting only a few hours of sleep before taking care of grades this morning. All told, I've had an egg sandwich, some biscuits and four liters of Gatorade/water in the last 28 hours.
I'm actually looking forward to being sick in the States. Not only will it be infinitely more comfortable, but my immune system is being exposed to such a spectrum of illnesses, American diseases will be cake.
And since I brought back peanut butter that Phillip's embrogada (maid) makes, I think I'm going to try a PB sandwich. It's actually somewhat appetizing.
It's hard to justify the important of teaching the difference between HIV and AIDS to people here. Health professionals here are 100% behind me and understand exactly why, but it's not obvious or even clear to most people.
The way the HIV/AIDS epidemic started here in sub-Saharan Africa, the conventional wisdom was that something - anything - needed to be done, fast. Which was and is true. And all that was done was helpful to some extent, but to turn the tables on the epidemic, the approach needs to be changed slightly.
The successful HIV/AIDS programs focus on understanding of the problem and why it needed to be avoided. There are many people here who can tell you that they need to use condoms, sterilized needles and new razor blades, but couldn't necessarily tell you what these things mean.
And so they have the information memorized, but have never been presented with applying it.
If you teach the difference between HIV and AIDS, they begin to see what's going on inside your body and how HIV gets in. It's the missing piece of the puzzle, and sets up the rest of the information you can present on the topic.
Peace
John
Tuesday, May 27, 2003
4/11/2003
About 300 students took me up on my offer of an optional take-home quiz, even though they could lose points - and though nobody lost points on it, only 20% of my students are passing. Oy! It's definitely not a good thing, but hopefully it will motivate them to study more. My tests need to improve as well, but I feel like I'm not testing them on learning when I give them questions they can answer. But I suppose education is not about being right all the time.
Hopefully, I'll be up to 35% by the end of the next trimester.
Peace
John
Hopefully, I'll be up to 35% by the end of the next trimester.
Peace
John
4/27/2003
THIS IS MOM --- MY WONDERFUL SON SURPRISED ME ON MY BIRTHDAY WITH A LIVE CONCERT FROM MOZAMBIQUE! IF YOU'VE BEEN READING THIS JOURNAL, YOU KNOW THAT HE'S PART OF A COMMUNITY CHORAL GROUP, AND HE HAD ARRANGED FOR THEM TO DO A FEW SONGS FOR ME AS PART OF A REGULAR REHEARSAL. WHAT A THRILL! BEAUTIFUL VOICES, BUT IN PORTUGUESE AND CHANGANA. I JUST RECEIVED A FAIRLY LIBERAL TRANSLATION OF ONE OF THE SONGS, AND THOUGHT I WOULD SHARE WITH YOU ALL (ALTHOUGH I THINK I'D RATHER NOT HAVE KNOWN HOW IT TRANSLATED...) ALICE:
THE LAND TOO LARGE
This great land makes them suffer greatly
We help them, the poor people who are sick in our family
Most of all, Africa
Where it's worst, Africa
Making them suffer
We are leaving this lie behind
I am the majority of this fight against cruelty.
They suffer the most
They live life without direction
In this place where things are thrown away
It was the children who wanted less
Slowly it is the children who are healthier
And perhaps it will be made right in all of them
Africa is too large.
Help!
...Like the spirit
Bless Africa.
THE LAND TOO LARGE
This great land makes them suffer greatly
We help them, the poor people who are sick in our family
Most of all, Africa
Where it's worst, Africa
Making them suffer
We are leaving this lie behind
I am the majority of this fight against cruelty.
They suffer the most
They live life without direction
In this place where things are thrown away
It was the children who wanted less
Slowly it is the children who are healthier
And perhaps it will be made right in all of them
Africa is too large.
Help!
...Like the spirit
Bless Africa.
Saturday, May 17, 2003
4/10/2003
I learn more and more every day how valuable patience is and how little of it I have for certain situations. Like students complaining.
I made a green leafy dish tonight. Literally, you take leaves from some plant (in this case, African sweet potato), wash them, and cut them, boil them until limp, then drain. Add fresh coconut milk, then onion, after a little while tomato and then finely ground peanuts. Serve over rice cooked with the coconut milk. Yum. And it costs about 15 Met (63 cents).
I want to get a flute here or one sent to me. I think I need a musical outlet aside from singing.
Peace
John
I made a green leafy dish tonight. Literally, you take leaves from some plant (in this case, African sweet potato), wash them, and cut them, boil them until limp, then drain. Add fresh coconut milk, then onion, after a little while tomato and then finely ground peanuts. Serve over rice cooked with the coconut milk. Yum. And it costs about 15 Met (63 cents).
I want to get a flute here or one sent to me. I think I need a musical outlet aside from singing.
Peace
John
4/09/2003
Today, peace seems more likely but there are many questions to be answered.
I worked on my kids' grades today. They have grades on a 0-20 scale instead of A-F or 0-100. Passing is considered 10 or above. About 75% of my kids are failing which is NOT good. Hopefully that will drastically improve this next semester.
Today was a tough day mentally. I'm pretty homesick, questioning why I'm here and want to stay here for another 20 or so months. I spent much of the day deep in thought, which is always dangerous.
Also, more and more students are demonstrating their disapproval with my exam proctoring and grading/test-giving habits, though Tober has been maintaining to them that he did the same thing.
And classes are getting more frustrating as it's the end of the trimester and many professors are not giving more classes and students are expecting to get out early or just not have classes at all. Plus, I'm trying very simple exercises in understanding the material instead of simply having them memorize the phrases, with very few results. It's so frustrating because that's one of the foundations of our educational system and it's completely foreign here.
But they need information before they can understand it, I suppose.
I think part of my recent emotional low has been hearing about and seeing Tober's travels which are extensive and incredibly adventurous. I'm jealous in a way and also pleasantly observant in another as he just sees the world slightly differently than I do. But it feels like the adventure of being here is rapidly grinding to a halt and to be around someone having the next adventure is hard.
I think I just need to start seeing my experience in a different light. I need to stop trying to be awed by the obvious things and keep good perspectives on the every day things which are still a huge deal. It's like seeing the world as a group of living things which are wildly amazing in their own right or seeing the world as atoms that are impossible to see but just as astonishing.
I need this "paradigm shift" soon (to borrow a phrase from my high school literary magazine) or more of my days will be emotionally draining.
Peace
John
I worked on my kids' grades today. They have grades on a 0-20 scale instead of A-F or 0-100. Passing is considered 10 or above. About 75% of my kids are failing which is NOT good. Hopefully that will drastically improve this next semester.
Today was a tough day mentally. I'm pretty homesick, questioning why I'm here and want to stay here for another 20 or so months. I spent much of the day deep in thought, which is always dangerous.
Also, more and more students are demonstrating their disapproval with my exam proctoring and grading/test-giving habits, though Tober has been maintaining to them that he did the same thing.
And classes are getting more frustrating as it's the end of the trimester and many professors are not giving more classes and students are expecting to get out early or just not have classes at all. Plus, I'm trying very simple exercises in understanding the material instead of simply having them memorize the phrases, with very few results. It's so frustrating because that's one of the foundations of our educational system and it's completely foreign here.
But they need information before they can understand it, I suppose.
I think part of my recent emotional low has been hearing about and seeing Tober's travels which are extensive and incredibly adventurous. I'm jealous in a way and also pleasantly observant in another as he just sees the world slightly differently than I do. But it feels like the adventure of being here is rapidly grinding to a halt and to be around someone having the next adventure is hard.
I think I just need to start seeing my experience in a different light. I need to stop trying to be awed by the obvious things and keep good perspectives on the every day things which are still a huge deal. It's like seeing the world as a group of living things which are wildly amazing in their own right or seeing the world as atoms that are impossible to see but just as astonishing.
I need this "paradigm shift" soon (to borrow a phrase from my high school literary magazine) or more of my days will be emotionally draining.
Peace
John
4/08/2003
Students often come up to me saying things like:
"I never received my exam", or
"I never did the second quiz", or
"When are you going to have a make-up quiz?"
And I always tell them there are only make-up quizzes and tests if they have justified their absence officially. This requires a minimal effort, so if they're serious about it, it will happen. But with the efforts, they put into complaining and cheating,you wonder why the same effort isn't put into studying.
I think this question really has to do with how they're taught to learn. And so studying isn't a matter of trying to digest the material in a different way but is just sitting down and memorizing.
I talked with the professor I substituted for on Friday, about the homework I gave his turma. He knew only half of the answer, unable to draw the connection between a molecule containing energy in discrete units. The problem isn't intelligence but a lack of knowledge. He knows what he is teaching, but only that.
For all of its pitfalls, the American system is wonderful.
I've been at seriously low motivation lately. I think it's just a predictable phase from being a little burned out and missing people like crazy.
I know what I'm doing is helping, but could I be helping in other ways as well? And it seems like a guilty pleasure to miss people, because I know I've got a free ride home.
Peace
John
"I never received my exam", or
"I never did the second quiz", or
"When are you going to have a make-up quiz?"
And I always tell them there are only make-up quizzes and tests if they have justified their absence officially. This requires a minimal effort, so if they're serious about it, it will happen. But with the efforts, they put into complaining and cheating,you wonder why the same effort isn't put into studying.
I think this question really has to do with how they're taught to learn. And so studying isn't a matter of trying to digest the material in a different way but is just sitting down and memorizing.
I talked with the professor I substituted for on Friday, about the homework I gave his turma. He knew only half of the answer, unable to draw the connection between a molecule containing energy in discrete units. The problem isn't intelligence but a lack of knowledge. He knows what he is teaching, but only that.
For all of its pitfalls, the American system is wonderful.
I've been at seriously low motivation lately. I think it's just a predictable phase from being a little burned out and missing people like crazy.
I know what I'm doing is helping, but could I be helping in other ways as well? And it seems like a guilty pleasure to miss people, because I know I've got a free ride home.
Peace
John
4/07/2003
Written here, today's date is 7/4. Semaphore! Sorry, couldn't resist the inside joke.
I fell behind this weekend in many respects, one of these being in journal writing. Saturday evening I had my first theater rehearsal. Sunday night I had my second.
The rehearsals are in the gymnasiu, at my school, a nice gymnasium by most standards. It's standard basketball-court sized, with a noticeable lack of bleachers for sitting or rims on the backboards for shooting. Populated by a few dozen desks and a handful of chairs, it's left locked most of the time with a padlock and metal fencing.
When facing front, there is a visible stage area that is rarely, if ever, used. Acoustics are horrible when there are less than 10 people present, and drastically improves the larger the crowd.
So I had my first rehearsal in this echo chamber Saturday night. There were five of us, all of different levels of experience. Two were women. We started with a trust fall and a concentration game called "Zip, Zap, Bop!" When pointed to, you can call "Zip" and point to someone next to you, "Zap" and point to someone across from you, or "Bop" and deflect the call to the caller. Nothing too difficult about this.
But then we did an improv game.
OK. I'm not good at dialogue - based improv games in ENGLISH. But when I don't even understand what is going on, don't know the cultural norms, and don't have a wonderful grasp on rapidly changing contexts in terms of speaking, I'm lost.
I had to laugh, because they just had no idea what I was going through, or could they have known. I was actually able to contribute little snippets, but it was just that.
We played the "continue the story" game where each person adds one phrase to a story. Yeah.
Then we were briefed on a plot we were to act out having to do with spousal abuse and counseling against it. I was to counsel the men in the situation. I did. Horribly. I think I told him to put his kids to work instead of his wife.
I learned a couple of things from this first experience. The first is that my traditional theater training is practically useless here. The second is that my improvisational Portuguese blows. The third is that theater here is dialogue-driven and very quick in that respect. The fourth is that gestures are incredibly important and a language unto themselves.
I left feeling dumber.
So Sunday night, I sucked it up and went again. This time we tried to build up characters by walking around in silence, then building on this by creating silent skits. Remember, there is an entirely different language of gesturing here. I'm still learning that, too.
We then discussed what each skit meant, and I threw in that the difference in gender roles in my culture make it hard for me to relay the same message. I explained that most pregnancies tend to be thoroughly discussed in serious relationships, without being able to explain why that is. I don't know if I offended them, but I'm starting to care less and less about censoring myself to fit into a culture I'm still trying to understand.
On Sunday, Phillip, Chris and I filmed more the bike safety maintenance video. Chris is hilarious. The video, if it gets published, will be a huge step for Peace Corps in terms of having a sense of humor about its policies!
The local kids have suddenly all whipped out the newest toy, like a fad anywhere else. They're playing with spinning top-like seeds that are about 3-4" long and have a couple grooves near the top. The grooves are to accommodate a small whip-like string attached to a 2' stick. The top is then wrapped in the string, placed on the ground, then spun into action with the stick. You keep it spinning by whipping the bottom of it, often sending the top flying several feet. It's wonderfully captivating to watch and equally difficult to do.
Today was Mozambican Women's Day. I invited (and bribed) my students to come to the festivities only to find out that there wasn't room for them to be a part of things. But I spend a few minutes talking with them about women's rights. I didn't preach anything, I just exposed the views of the boys and the girls in the group. Hopefully, I started a few discussions because they probably don't think to talk about gender roles as they're pretty clearly defined. Or at least it seems that way.
This was followed up by a dinner for the professors. Cow head. It wasn't hard to be a vegetarian. Luckily, the others were pretty drunk, so my freakishness (not eating meat) was pleasantly blown out of proportion. Oh yeah, it smelled really good.
The Canadians, Charles and Annie, read my journal from time to time. They like to see their names mentioned, so here they are. Their dog, Tofo, is a cutie and is living it up. They have a wonderful house and enjoy their jobs for the most part, relishing and lamenting the stumbling blocks all along the way. And they're from Quebec. If I say anything more, I could get into trouble!
Peace
John
I fell behind this weekend in many respects, one of these being in journal writing. Saturday evening I had my first theater rehearsal. Sunday night I had my second.
The rehearsals are in the gymnasiu, at my school, a nice gymnasium by most standards. It's standard basketball-court sized, with a noticeable lack of bleachers for sitting or rims on the backboards for shooting. Populated by a few dozen desks and a handful of chairs, it's left locked most of the time with a padlock and metal fencing.
When facing front, there is a visible stage area that is rarely, if ever, used. Acoustics are horrible when there are less than 10 people present, and drastically improves the larger the crowd.
So I had my first rehearsal in this echo chamber Saturday night. There were five of us, all of different levels of experience. Two were women. We started with a trust fall and a concentration game called "Zip, Zap, Bop!" When pointed to, you can call "Zip" and point to someone next to you, "Zap" and point to someone across from you, or "Bop" and deflect the call to the caller. Nothing too difficult about this.
But then we did an improv game.
OK. I'm not good at dialogue - based improv games in ENGLISH. But when I don't even understand what is going on, don't know the cultural norms, and don't have a wonderful grasp on rapidly changing contexts in terms of speaking, I'm lost.
I had to laugh, because they just had no idea what I was going through, or could they have known. I was actually able to contribute little snippets, but it was just that.
We played the "continue the story" game where each person adds one phrase to a story. Yeah.
Then we were briefed on a plot we were to act out having to do with spousal abuse and counseling against it. I was to counsel the men in the situation. I did. Horribly. I think I told him to put his kids to work instead of his wife.
I learned a couple of things from this first experience. The first is that my traditional theater training is practically useless here. The second is that my improvisational Portuguese blows. The third is that theater here is dialogue-driven and very quick in that respect. The fourth is that gestures are incredibly important and a language unto themselves.
I left feeling dumber.
So Sunday night, I sucked it up and went again. This time we tried to build up characters by walking around in silence, then building on this by creating silent skits. Remember, there is an entirely different language of gesturing here. I'm still learning that, too.
We then discussed what each skit meant, and I threw in that the difference in gender roles in my culture make it hard for me to relay the same message. I explained that most pregnancies tend to be thoroughly discussed in serious relationships, without being able to explain why that is. I don't know if I offended them, but I'm starting to care less and less about censoring myself to fit into a culture I'm still trying to understand.
On Sunday, Phillip, Chris and I filmed more the bike safety maintenance video. Chris is hilarious. The video, if it gets published, will be a huge step for Peace Corps in terms of having a sense of humor about its policies!
The local kids have suddenly all whipped out the newest toy, like a fad anywhere else. They're playing with spinning top-like seeds that are about 3-4" long and have a couple grooves near the top. The grooves are to accommodate a small whip-like string attached to a 2' stick. The top is then wrapped in the string, placed on the ground, then spun into action with the stick. You keep it spinning by whipping the bottom of it, often sending the top flying several feet. It's wonderfully captivating to watch and equally difficult to do.
Today was Mozambican Women's Day. I invited (and bribed) my students to come to the festivities only to find out that there wasn't room for them to be a part of things. But I spend a few minutes talking with them about women's rights. I didn't preach anything, I just exposed the views of the boys and the girls in the group. Hopefully, I started a few discussions because they probably don't think to talk about gender roles as they're pretty clearly defined. Or at least it seems that way.
This was followed up by a dinner for the professors. Cow head. It wasn't hard to be a vegetarian. Luckily, the others were pretty drunk, so my freakishness (not eating meat) was pleasantly blown out of proportion. Oh yeah, it smelled really good.
The Canadians, Charles and Annie, read my journal from time to time. They like to see their names mentioned, so here they are. Their dog, Tofo, is a cutie and is living it up. They have a wonderful house and enjoy their jobs for the most part, relishing and lamenting the stumbling blocks all along the way. And they're from Quebec. If I say anything more, I could get into trouble!
Peace
John
4/06/2003
For the last two nights, I've gone to theater rehearsal and drank afterwards. Obviously, by my handwriting which is visible only to my mother (OMIGOD...Mom) I'm still in a state. Theater rehearsal is hard. I'll make sure to write about it.
The best time to leave is when you're having a good time.
I really miss people. Really.
Peace
John
The best time to leave is when you're having a good time.
I really miss people. Really.
Peace
John
4/01/2003
Too many thoughts and too little time to write them down.
I managed to correct 7 of the 8 tests - that's 350 tests to be exact. I figured that it takes me about 2 to 2.5 minutes to grade each test. Doing the math, that's about 16 hours. Blah.
I'm thinking of having a reed hut built in the yard somewhere and getting some mosquito netting for it, too.
It's been about 6 months that I've been in Mozambique. I officially can never give blood in the US. In 5 months, I turn 25 and can legally rent a car in any state.
The word in Changana for "to need" is "ku swilava". To say "to want" or "to be looking for", you say "ku lava". To hear is "ku twa", and the suffix "-isa" means that this thing is the doer of the action ("ku funda" is to learn, "ku fundisa" is to teach). Thus, "ku twise" is to make heard or felt, "ku switwisqa" is to make understood, and "ku switwisisa" is to understand. So the prefix "swi-" is still a mystery to me, but it seems to relate to the urgency of a matter. "Swoswi" is now, "swinene" is a lot.
I can't wait to go to a baseball game and get some outrageously priced nachos during the 2005 season.
I wish the kids I teach had a stronger passion for learning and weren't so caught up in my foreign identity or in what they can get away with in class.
I have a long "to do" list, which is daunting but exciting.
Threw around the frisbee with some of the neighborhood kids who are learning Ultimate very quickly. Came back and threw with some younger girls whose curiosity had been sparked. I had a sizeable Changana conversation with them, telling them that I didn't have or need a girlfriend in Mozambique.
Blake's dad is sending "French in 3 months". My language appetite may never be satisfied! I don't know what it is, but I am like a sponge.
There are 7 days left in the trimester. I need to give 2 makeup quizzes and 1 extra quiz to students who want to take it. I'm letting them do the work at home but making the questions harder. I will most likely receive a ton of crap, but there will be some diamonds in the rough.
A student requested that I recorrect a quiz and a test of hers. She wrote answers after the fact (I marked it in such a way that I'd be able to tell) and so I'll give her no extra points and may take some away.
If a student arrives late, I've started asking them a relevant question in Biology before they can enter. It works really well to get the whole class involved.
Working out today felt amazing, because I've been so sentient lately.
Peace
John
I managed to correct 7 of the 8 tests - that's 350 tests to be exact. I figured that it takes me about 2 to 2.5 minutes to grade each test. Doing the math, that's about 16 hours. Blah.
I'm thinking of having a reed hut built in the yard somewhere and getting some mosquito netting for it, too.
It's been about 6 months that I've been in Mozambique. I officially can never give blood in the US. In 5 months, I turn 25 and can legally rent a car in any state.
The word in Changana for "to need" is "ku swilava". To say "to want" or "to be looking for", you say "ku lava". To hear is "ku twa", and the suffix "-isa" means that this thing is the doer of the action ("ku funda" is to learn, "ku fundisa" is to teach). Thus, "ku twise" is to make heard or felt, "ku switwisqa" is to make understood, and "ku switwisisa" is to understand. So the prefix "swi-" is still a mystery to me, but it seems to relate to the urgency of a matter. "Swoswi" is now, "swinene" is a lot.
I can't wait to go to a baseball game and get some outrageously priced nachos during the 2005 season.
I wish the kids I teach had a stronger passion for learning and weren't so caught up in my foreign identity or in what they can get away with in class.
I have a long "to do" list, which is daunting but exciting.
Threw around the frisbee with some of the neighborhood kids who are learning Ultimate very quickly. Came back and threw with some younger girls whose curiosity had been sparked. I had a sizeable Changana conversation with them, telling them that I didn't have or need a girlfriend in Mozambique.
Blake's dad is sending "French in 3 months". My language appetite may never be satisfied! I don't know what it is, but I am like a sponge.
There are 7 days left in the trimester. I need to give 2 makeup quizzes and 1 extra quiz to students who want to take it. I'm letting them do the work at home but making the questions harder. I will most likely receive a ton of crap, but there will be some diamonds in the rough.
A student requested that I recorrect a quiz and a test of hers. She wrote answers after the fact (I marked it in such a way that I'd be able to tell) and so I'll give her no extra points and may take some away.
If a student arrives late, I've started asking them a relevant question in Biology before they can enter. It works really well to get the whole class involved.
Working out today felt amazing, because I've been so sentient lately.
Peace
John
3/31/2003
Grading the exams has given me plenty of time to think about how the educational system is here and how people approach education here.
In talking with Tober lately, a few good points have come up. People see education here as a diploma and not a mental state. So this means that there is very little motivation to go above and beyond the required material: passion is rarely bred.
Students learn how to memorize the given information very well, but skip learning how to use. For instance,
"Carbohydrates or lipids, which are not soluble in water?"
No response.
"What are insoluble in water?"
"Lipids", the response.
"So which are not soluble?"
The confusion is not the word "insoluble" - they know what it means and how to demonstrate it. The confusion is what constitutes learning - knowing words, or understanding them.
My next test is going to be open book, and all the questions will require the use of at least two different concepts. Not impossible to do in the alotted time (so that they have to know some of the info), but just enough to test completely and have them think about the topics.
Peace
John
In talking with Tober lately, a few good points have come up. People see education here as a diploma and not a mental state. So this means that there is very little motivation to go above and beyond the required material: passion is rarely bred.
Students learn how to memorize the given information very well, but skip learning how to use. For instance,
"Carbohydrates or lipids, which are not soluble in water?"
No response.
"What are insoluble in water?"
"Lipids", the response.
"So which are not soluble?"
The confusion is not the word "insoluble" - they know what it means and how to demonstrate it. The confusion is what constitutes learning - knowing words, or understanding them.
My next test is going to be open book, and all the questions will require the use of at least two different concepts. Not impossible to do in the alotted time (so that they have to know some of the info), but just enough to test completely and have them think about the topics.
Peace
John
3/30/2003
I spent the weekend in a beach city and stayed with Chris. Went to the ocean during the day yesterday, then went to the local discoteca after a LOT of beer at several different bars. Needless to say, it was a great time and a welcome break from what has become the norm.
I found out that my Changana improves with intoxication level - or at least my perception of adequacy.
It's amazing how much a few key words in a language can do for you.
I still have a ton of exam correcting to do and sleep to catch up on. More, deeper thoughts later on...
Peace
John
I found out that my Changana improves with intoxication level - or at least my perception of adequacy.
It's amazing how much a few key words in a language can do for you.
I still have a ton of exam correcting to do and sleep to catch up on. More, deeper thoughts later on...
Peace
John
3/28/2003
I was sitting outside an old dilapidated classroom at the back of my school, watching the professor "control" the test being given, when I got motivated.
This was tonight, as I took over for the other 9th grade Biology professor (he teaches at night) who's recovering from malaria. During the ACPs the professor whose test it is needs to be around to answer questions. I had already made the rounds, walking into each of the three classrooms (all in a row) and explaining some of the harder questions.
But the students were hard at work now, and the professor controlling the middle turma had started to look for notebooks the kids were hiding. He found a couple, then came outside to talk with me. I never leave the students alone like that, but then again, "Stor controla musto" (Professor controls a lot) and the others don't.
Since I knew he had just scratched the tip of the iceberg, and I was bored waiting for them to be done, I offered my assistance.
"Can I look for some notebooks? I bet I'll find a lot."
He agreed wholeheartedly, sitting where I had been, in view of the front of the room only.
So I set to work, benignly answering questions, all the while on the lookout for those kids looking down at their laps or to the side - and most importantly, looking at me. I got a good handle on who to be watching, and a couple minutes later I spied my first two victims. Ignoring the one who saw me look at them, I snagged the notebook of a 25-year old (or so) woman and flung it casually towards the front of the room.
Knowing the professor could only see the end result of my labors, I knew how funny this would look.
I then hopped over to the next one, flung his book, then went back to work, picking off two more. Then, just to raise my stats a little, I started checking the desks, resulting in three more. All flung.
"It looks like you found a lot!"
As fun as it was, it's equally sad. These students know how to cheat very well, but don't know how to process information because they don't need to. So how do we change that? These habits are formed so early in school, there's very little we can do at this stage. And because the curriculum is ambitious, there's less time to focus on the main principles. So they'll find more ways to cheat because they feel that they can't handle all the information.
I've been trying to figure out lately why people are inspired by others. It seems like some people are drawn to prominent figures who've had to fight their way up and others are drawn to ordinary people who see it as their duty to give.
It's when nothing is asked for in return that the act seems to be truly inspiring.
Peace
John
This was tonight, as I took over for the other 9th grade Biology professor (he teaches at night) who's recovering from malaria. During the ACPs the professor whose test it is needs to be around to answer questions. I had already made the rounds, walking into each of the three classrooms (all in a row) and explaining some of the harder questions.
But the students were hard at work now, and the professor controlling the middle turma had started to look for notebooks the kids were hiding. He found a couple, then came outside to talk with me. I never leave the students alone like that, but then again, "Stor controla musto" (Professor controls a lot) and the others don't.
Since I knew he had just scratched the tip of the iceberg, and I was bored waiting for them to be done, I offered my assistance.
"Can I look for some notebooks? I bet I'll find a lot."
He agreed wholeheartedly, sitting where I had been, in view of the front of the room only.
So I set to work, benignly answering questions, all the while on the lookout for those kids looking down at their laps or to the side - and most importantly, looking at me. I got a good handle on who to be watching, and a couple minutes later I spied my first two victims. Ignoring the one who saw me look at them, I snagged the notebook of a 25-year old (or so) woman and flung it casually towards the front of the room.
Knowing the professor could only see the end result of my labors, I knew how funny this would look.
I then hopped over to the next one, flung his book, then went back to work, picking off two more. Then, just to raise my stats a little, I started checking the desks, resulting in three more. All flung.
"It looks like you found a lot!"
As fun as it was, it's equally sad. These students know how to cheat very well, but don't know how to process information because they don't need to. So how do we change that? These habits are formed so early in school, there's very little we can do at this stage. And because the curriculum is ambitious, there's less time to focus on the main principles. So they'll find more ways to cheat because they feel that they can't handle all the information.
I've been trying to figure out lately why people are inspired by others. It seems like some people are drawn to prominent figures who've had to fight their way up and others are drawn to ordinary people who see it as their duty to give.
It's when nothing is asked for in return that the act seems to be truly inspiring.
Peace
John
3/27/2003
I spoke with the guy at GATV today, and he's looking forward to collaborating on the project.
Alfredo corrected first lesson.
I got Girl Scout cookies from my mom.
I made sweet potato fries from African sweet potatoes.
I learned another tense in Changana.
I'm going to the coast this weekend.
I am ridiculously tired. It's good.
Peace
John
Alfredo corrected first lesson.
I got Girl Scout cookies from my mom.
I made sweet potato fries from African sweet potatoes.
I learned another tense in Changana.
I'm going to the coast this weekend.
I am ridiculously tired. It's good.
Peace
John
3/26/2003
Tober arrived today, to stay for about a week. His presence was announced by about a half-dozen kids who were telling me about it on my way back from shopping.
I remember when I was on site visit, barely being able to understand what was going on around town and in school. But I've got such a firm grasp on the language, albeit in limited contexts, that it's not my main concern any more. Seeing that difference helped me see that very clearly.
I visited a new GATV clinic where HIV testing is done free of charge. A student of mine, Abdul, and Tober had joined me to see if I could work on a collaboration at all with this group. Minutes later, after I refused some coffee and an HIV test, 30 men and women came streaming out of some back room to watch a video.
Not only does this office have a TV, but it looks like any run-of-the-mill clinic in the States, which was quite jarring.
Apparently, they were training new employees and advocates. Videos were shown on mock situations dealing with power in the community and HIV and the visible effects of STDs (very graphic). As they were busy, I said I'd come back tomorrow to talk.
But Tober suggested, in order to remove the stigma of coming to get tested, that I bring all of my students by to see the facilities - a fantastic suggestion. Tomorrow I'm also going to visit the hospital to talk with a domestic organization, Gerecao Biz. And there's a church right across from the school where AIDS patients stay. If I'm feeling brave enough, I might go there, too. But to make those rounds, I'd need to bring a group of volunteers from my classes and not an entire class. We'll see - I've been assigned a couple of professors to work with in developing the curriculum, I've got my Changana tutor correcting the lessons, and Blake's given a lesson that I suggested and developed with him.
As long as I don't lose this momentum and motivation, this can go quite far. It's pretty exciting.
Peace
John
I remember when I was on site visit, barely being able to understand what was going on around town and in school. But I've got such a firm grasp on the language, albeit in limited contexts, that it's not my main concern any more. Seeing that difference helped me see that very clearly.
I visited a new GATV clinic where HIV testing is done free of charge. A student of mine, Abdul, and Tober had joined me to see if I could work on a collaboration at all with this group. Minutes later, after I refused some coffee and an HIV test, 30 men and women came streaming out of some back room to watch a video.
Not only does this office have a TV, but it looks like any run-of-the-mill clinic in the States, which was quite jarring.
Apparently, they were training new employees and advocates. Videos were shown on mock situations dealing with power in the community and HIV and the visible effects of STDs (very graphic). As they were busy, I said I'd come back tomorrow to talk.
But Tober suggested, in order to remove the stigma of coming to get tested, that I bring all of my students by to see the facilities - a fantastic suggestion. Tomorrow I'm also going to visit the hospital to talk with a domestic organization, Gerecao Biz. And there's a church right across from the school where AIDS patients stay. If I'm feeling brave enough, I might go there, too. But to make those rounds, I'd need to bring a group of volunteers from my classes and not an entire class. We'll see - I've been assigned a couple of professors to work with in developing the curriculum, I've got my Changana tutor correcting the lessons, and Blake's given a lesson that I suggested and developed with him.
As long as I don't lose this momentum and motivation, this can go quite far. It's pretty exciting.
Peace
John
3/25/2003
(ONCE MORE WE'RE A BIT OUT OF ORDER, BUT NOT TOO BADLY THIS TIME. MOM)
On my way to an ACP today, I faked like I was going into my favorite turma, and on turning a different direction, received the standing ovation and handshakes of my life. Kids are deathly afraid of me. I walked by other turmas while they were taking their ACPs and from just passing, saw all sorts of cheating.
They have learned very well how to cheat.
Tomorrow I control the youngest turma of 10th grade. It's going to be quite interesting.
Changana is lotsa fun, but sometimes I think my head's going to explode. There are only eight numbers - the rest are combinations of 1,2,3,4,5,10, 100 or 1000. 1973 = 1000 + (5+4) x 100 + (5+2) x 70 + 3. No wonder they use Portuguese numbers!
Peace
John
On my way to an ACP today, I faked like I was going into my favorite turma, and on turning a different direction, received the standing ovation and handshakes of my life. Kids are deathly afraid of me. I walked by other turmas while they were taking their ACPs and from just passing, saw all sorts of cheating.
They have learned very well how to cheat.
Tomorrow I control the youngest turma of 10th grade. It's going to be quite interesting.
Changana is lotsa fun, but sometimes I think my head's going to explode. There are only eight numbers - the rest are combinations of 1,2,3,4,5,10, 100 or 1000. 1973 = 1000 + (5+4) x 100 + (5+2) x 70 + 3. No wonder they use Portuguese numbers!
Peace
John
Saturday, May 03, 2003
4/4/2003
It was a good teaching day.
With some time to kill in one of my older classes, I asked if they had questions about anything at all. I got war questions, goatee questions, and thankfully, HIV questions.
For the first time, I got asked about sex with a virgin and if it's a cure for HIV. I said no and explained exactly why, because once a person has HIV, it can't leave their body.
I asked if they understood my explanation, and one kid in particular said he didn't.
"Venha ca", I told him. "Come here."
He made his way from the back of the room to meet me in front. I asked for a female volunteer as well - very careful to not volunteer anyone unwilling.
A girl stood up who I didn't expect to stand up - she had falsified her exam after I returned it, to try and say that she deserved more points. I figured out what she had done and had deducted 25% of the points from an already low score (a 32.5% was now a 7.5%) and returned it. But her attitude was changed, too, to a more respectful tone.
I stood up there, hands on one shoulder a piece, using them as models only, so the kids could put ideas to faces. I said that we would assume he has HIV and she is a virgin. There were laughs as she insisted this was the truth. I then explained that if they have sex, he will still have HIV and if they do it without a condom, she will have it too. And they got it.
Tonight, I taught a lesson so my counterpart who teaches 9th grade at night, could watch a lesson. This was his turma, and I was looking forward to a larger audience, not to mention older.
The lesson went fantastically well, and the kids (adults) seemed to really get into it, understanding my Portuguese and participating when prompted. I asked for the definition of a background concept, got a prompt response and then asked the student what it meant. He was stumped. I explained it in simple terms, to a few understanding faces, but still lost for the most part. Regardless, it's better than usual when apathy and disrespect take center stage.
Professor Teofilo thoroughly enjoyed my lesson, especially my use of visual aids, command of the subject, and discipline. During the lesson, a girl stood up to correct my Portuguese, and I quickly argued back that I was right the whole time, and "would she like to have a Portuguese lesson tonight, as well?"
Yeah, it sounds prick-ish, but the students want to cut you down because they think you have this unattainable worldliness and intelligence - however inapplicable to life in Mozambique, thus making you a social outcast. So you're an idiot savant, and taking away that one advantage you seem to have makes you inferior.
But I try to be worldly and intelligent and caring - truly caring. I admit readily in class that I don't know certain things about Portuguese or the culture here or many biological topics. And I think they're starting to realize that I don't know it all, and an education like they see in me is not unattainable but is a matter of thinking in a different way. The real question seems to be whether they WANT to think that way. But the more human I appear, the less they try and tear me down.
So after I fought this girl off, I asked whether she wanted an English lesson, kind of to the whole class. They took it as a joke, and I think the girl actually felt a little shame - not for being wrong, but for assuming I needed to be cut down.
One other thing. Earlier this week, on Monday, I lashed out at a student. It's the first time I've used physical means to discipline, even though it was minor and didn't even work properly.
I was giving a review of the exam, and fruitlessly asking for participation on even the simplest questions. This got to be extremely frustrating, because I knew they just didn't want to be there and weren't making the slightest effort. To compound matters, these two girls near the back were constantly talking, even after I stopped class and addressed them directly. They didn't even notice I was talking to them, so I went back to what I was doing, trying to take some deep breaths.
I could hear them loud and clear as I turned back around, so I whipped around and shot the piece of chalk I was holding in their direction. It hit a boy sitting in front of them, and I immediately apologized. The girls realized what was going on and shut up.
But I was fairly shaken up that I would do something like that - I knew it was unjustifiable and not really helpful discipline.
I hope I can control my frustration better the next time.
Peace
John
With some time to kill in one of my older classes, I asked if they had questions about anything at all. I got war questions, goatee questions, and thankfully, HIV questions.
For the first time, I got asked about sex with a virgin and if it's a cure for HIV. I said no and explained exactly why, because once a person has HIV, it can't leave their body.
I asked if they understood my explanation, and one kid in particular said he didn't.
"Venha ca", I told him. "Come here."
He made his way from the back of the room to meet me in front. I asked for a female volunteer as well - very careful to not volunteer anyone unwilling.
A girl stood up who I didn't expect to stand up - she had falsified her exam after I returned it, to try and say that she deserved more points. I figured out what she had done and had deducted 25% of the points from an already low score (a 32.5% was now a 7.5%) and returned it. But her attitude was changed, too, to a more respectful tone.
I stood up there, hands on one shoulder a piece, using them as models only, so the kids could put ideas to faces. I said that we would assume he has HIV and she is a virgin. There were laughs as she insisted this was the truth. I then explained that if they have sex, he will still have HIV and if they do it without a condom, she will have it too. And they got it.
Tonight, I taught a lesson so my counterpart who teaches 9th grade at night, could watch a lesson. This was his turma, and I was looking forward to a larger audience, not to mention older.
The lesson went fantastically well, and the kids (adults) seemed to really get into it, understanding my Portuguese and participating when prompted. I asked for the definition of a background concept, got a prompt response and then asked the student what it meant. He was stumped. I explained it in simple terms, to a few understanding faces, but still lost for the most part. Regardless, it's better than usual when apathy and disrespect take center stage.
Professor Teofilo thoroughly enjoyed my lesson, especially my use of visual aids, command of the subject, and discipline. During the lesson, a girl stood up to correct my Portuguese, and I quickly argued back that I was right the whole time, and "would she like to have a Portuguese lesson tonight, as well?"
Yeah, it sounds prick-ish, but the students want to cut you down because they think you have this unattainable worldliness and intelligence - however inapplicable to life in Mozambique, thus making you a social outcast. So you're an idiot savant, and taking away that one advantage you seem to have makes you inferior.
But I try to be worldly and intelligent and caring - truly caring. I admit readily in class that I don't know certain things about Portuguese or the culture here or many biological topics. And I think they're starting to realize that I don't know it all, and an education like they see in me is not unattainable but is a matter of thinking in a different way. The real question seems to be whether they WANT to think that way. But the more human I appear, the less they try and tear me down.
So after I fought this girl off, I asked whether she wanted an English lesson, kind of to the whole class. They took it as a joke, and I think the girl actually felt a little shame - not for being wrong, but for assuming I needed to be cut down.
One other thing. Earlier this week, on Monday, I lashed out at a student. It's the first time I've used physical means to discipline, even though it was minor and didn't even work properly.
I was giving a review of the exam, and fruitlessly asking for participation on even the simplest questions. This got to be extremely frustrating, because I knew they just didn't want to be there and weren't making the slightest effort. To compound matters, these two girls near the back were constantly talking, even after I stopped class and addressed them directly. They didn't even notice I was talking to them, so I went back to what I was doing, trying to take some deep breaths.
I could hear them loud and clear as I turned back around, so I whipped around and shot the piece of chalk I was holding in their direction. It hit a boy sitting in front of them, and I immediately apologized. The girls realized what was going on and shut up.
But I was fairly shaken up that I would do something like that - I knew it was unjustifiable and not really helpful discipline.
I hope I can control my frustration better the next time.
Peace
John
4/3/2003
I figured out why kids REALLY soak up books and handout literature like it was going to self-destruct in 30 seconds.
There are no big libraries. Internet and TV are rare luxuries. The radio plays a lot of music. People don't make enough to buy books. So there is a dearth of available information, and people are constantly seeking out resources.
When people here find something to read, they disappear into it. You can be in the middle of conversation, and the next thing you know, the other person's picked up a book and is in their own little world. It's a wonderful thing to see, but every time it happens, it seems so childish, that it's quite jarring. Often my students will crowd around some new piece of information like they were half their age.
So, on first glance, it seemslike American kids are just lazy and ignorant. But the truth is, American kids know a ton more about the world around them because they are always being barraged with information from every direction. American kids don't need to pick up a book to be informed - their very basic human need for information is satiated (and saturated) by American culture.
So where does that leave school? One might think that school would be radically different, with students who are completely attentive, thankful for the opportunity, etc., but it's not that way. Kids are kids and adapt very quickly to any situation. So they're used to getting talked to and soaking up what they're told, but not trying to understand it. It's enough to simply have access to this information, so education has been very understandably left at that.
So now I take this to my HIV/AIDS course - how do I teach in such a situation? I've taken the approach that the information presented needs to be stripped down to the bare necessities, and the crux of the lessons needs to be internalizing the concepts. Which, of course, is the crux and ideal of most educational programs, but can rarely be implemented due to other problems. Like time. The biggest enemy of a teacher here is not apathy, but time. "If I just had another week", "If I hadn't ended class early that one day...", etc. There are so many questions to answer, it's overwhelming.
In other news, I'm going to be playing in a school-organized volleyball game on our day off, Monday. We have the day off because it's Mozambique Women's Day and also World Health Day. But I never signed up for this game, I was just assigned to be in it like a local celebrity who has a community as his booking agent. I'll be playing with the director of my school and the district director, among others. And due to the formality of address here, I'm wondering how communication on the court will work.
"Prof!"
"Prof!"
"Mr. Director!"
"Mr. District Director!"
"Prof!"
Of course, I'm not really expecting all these people to play, but it could be quite entertaining.
Peace
John
There are no big libraries. Internet and TV are rare luxuries. The radio plays a lot of music. People don't make enough to buy books. So there is a dearth of available information, and people are constantly seeking out resources.
When people here find something to read, they disappear into it. You can be in the middle of conversation, and the next thing you know, the other person's picked up a book and is in their own little world. It's a wonderful thing to see, but every time it happens, it seems so childish, that it's quite jarring. Often my students will crowd around some new piece of information like they were half their age.
So, on first glance, it seemslike American kids are just lazy and ignorant. But the truth is, American kids know a ton more about the world around them because they are always being barraged with information from every direction. American kids don't need to pick up a book to be informed - their very basic human need for information is satiated (and saturated) by American culture.
So where does that leave school? One might think that school would be radically different, with students who are completely attentive, thankful for the opportunity, etc., but it's not that way. Kids are kids and adapt very quickly to any situation. So they're used to getting talked to and soaking up what they're told, but not trying to understand it. It's enough to simply have access to this information, so education has been very understandably left at that.
So now I take this to my HIV/AIDS course - how do I teach in such a situation? I've taken the approach that the information presented needs to be stripped down to the bare necessities, and the crux of the lessons needs to be internalizing the concepts. Which, of course, is the crux and ideal of most educational programs, but can rarely be implemented due to other problems. Like time. The biggest enemy of a teacher here is not apathy, but time. "If I just had another week", "If I hadn't ended class early that one day...", etc. There are so many questions to answer, it's overwhelming.
In other news, I'm going to be playing in a school-organized volleyball game on our day off, Monday. We have the day off because it's Mozambique Women's Day and also World Health Day. But I never signed up for this game, I was just assigned to be in it like a local celebrity who has a community as his booking agent. I'll be playing with the director of my school and the district director, among others. And due to the formality of address here, I'm wondering how communication on the court will work.
"Prof!"
"Prof!"
"Mr. Director!"
"Mr. District Director!"
"Prof!"
Of course, I'm not really expecting all these people to play, but it could be quite entertaining.
Peace
John
4/2/2003
I've got a pretty good handle on discipline, but when something's funny, REALLY funny, I lose my composure and quite often control of the room. But sometimes a little barulho (noise) lets the kids vent and joking around a little is a good segue to introduce a new fact. My oldest turma actually looked intrigued at one point in my lecture today because they goofed off productively.
Before that happened, though, I have a mini-HIV lesson on safe and unsafe behaviors. One kid asked if kissing was safe. As I was saying that open-mouthed kissing has a slight risk of HIV infection, a kid in the back was....demonstrating. With himself, mind you, but he was sitting there with his tongue wagging away. As I wasn't sure if my explanation in Portuguese was sufficient, I asked him to demonstrate for everyone. Alone. The kids asked if he needed a girl - when I said no, they asked if he was to demonstrate on me, again NO. This whole deal was pretty funny, and then I did the explanation again. He showed a dry kiss by kissing his hand (after a bit of thought) and then after a longer pause, knowing full well what was coming next, he showed us the sloppiest solitary wet kiss ever shown in a Mozambican classroom. I couldn't help but laugh myself, which gets the kids going, too.
Then, after a demonstration of how exercise affect the body, using another student, I asked the class what someone needs to do after sweating a lot, in the context of biological cellular processes.
The "kisser" stood up and said, "Take a bath", completely in rhythm with my question. I doubled over as to not reveal how hard I was laughing, then continued the class.
It wasn't really that funny a joke, but knowing that things like this translate and are a part of many cultures is comforting if not downright hilarious.
Portuguese and Changana are making more sense and improving every day. Seeing my host family with these new faculties is going to be great fun!
Six more days of classes in this trimester, 2 1/2 weeks until my first in-service training, about 7 months from my halfway point of service, 5 months from my 25th birthday, and 6 months in Mozambique. I'll shut up about milestones for a little while.
Peace
John
Before that happened, though, I have a mini-HIV lesson on safe and unsafe behaviors. One kid asked if kissing was safe. As I was saying that open-mouthed kissing has a slight risk of HIV infection, a kid in the back was....demonstrating. With himself, mind you, but he was sitting there with his tongue wagging away. As I wasn't sure if my explanation in Portuguese was sufficient, I asked him to demonstrate for everyone. Alone. The kids asked if he needed a girl - when I said no, they asked if he was to demonstrate on me, again NO. This whole deal was pretty funny, and then I did the explanation again. He showed a dry kiss by kissing his hand (after a bit of thought) and then after a longer pause, knowing full well what was coming next, he showed us the sloppiest solitary wet kiss ever shown in a Mozambican classroom. I couldn't help but laugh myself, which gets the kids going, too.
Then, after a demonstration of how exercise affect the body, using another student, I asked the class what someone needs to do after sweating a lot, in the context of biological cellular processes.
The "kisser" stood up and said, "Take a bath", completely in rhythm with my question. I doubled over as to not reveal how hard I was laughing, then continued the class.
It wasn't really that funny a joke, but knowing that things like this translate and are a part of many cultures is comforting if not downright hilarious.
Portuguese and Changana are making more sense and improving every day. Seeing my host family with these new faculties is going to be great fun!
Six more days of classes in this trimester, 2 1/2 weeks until my first in-service training, about 7 months from my halfway point of service, 5 months from my 25th birthday, and 6 months in Mozambique. I'll shut up about milestones for a little while.
Peace
John
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