Today I think I felt as isolated from home as I have the entire time here, and ironically it was on a day that I checked Email and received a couple phone calls. I'm finding out who my true friends are and their "true colors" are coming through. I'm also finding out which relationships I need to work on - it's interesting what distance can do.
And though I've been in Moz over four months now...well that was yesterday. Moving on...
Many volunteers have an embrogada (literally "employee") to do their laundry and/or to cook, clean, do general housework, etc. 99% of the time, this employee is a woman. It is suggested that we get an embrogada because we have many chores to be doing - and it's relatively inexpensive. And many volunteers have one for at least the laundry, as does my housemate. He pays 50 Met or $2.08, for the laundry to be done.
From the beginning, I haven't wanted an embrogada because I've wanted to be self-sufficient and I want to show others that I'm hard-working. Having learned that respect is not necessarily earned by doing your laundry yourself or by cooking (although it can help with some people), it seems that the point is moot. Respect will be earned in other ways.
I still would like to be self-sufficient as much as I can. If I start to feel like others are doing too much for me, then I feel lazy and like I am lording it over them. Plus, there's no satisfation like wearing clothes that I washed myself, with my own hands - the same goes for food.
There's a last point in all this, which is that I don't want to flaunt my financial status. Unfortunately, that aspect is inevitable and plain as the glasses on my face. So this only makes a small dent in that perspective.
From the other side of the debate, having an embrogada frees you up to do the real work as a volunteer, supports the local economy and cements your place in the community as someone to be respected (whether that correlates with having respect is not my place to say). So really, it's an open debate and very much a personal preference. For now, I'm still doing my own laundry. And it's fun!
On the topic of fitting in to the local culture, it occurred to me today (as it does on many days) the difference in average lifespan between myself and an average Mozambican. I can expect to live at least 70 years, while a Mozambican lifespan is about half of that number. I see people matriculating in school while in their 30s. I see 50 year old men (rarely) as wise, respected elders of their communities. The obituaries routinely feature very young-looking people. This is due to malnutrition, non-potable water, malaria and AIDS.
So how do I relate to a culture that, by American standards, should be constantly in fear, but isn't? They accept that their lives are more dangerous, but how do I accept that they should be worrying about AIDS vs malaria? And when I'm guaranteed to have a higher quality of life, because of money, it's very easy to talk about making certain sacrifices to ensure my health, but what happens when there are no certainties? Still, I don't have answers to these questions.
By the way, my pedagogical director and fellow Biology teacher has a very similar smile and demeanor to Denzel Washington! He is an amazingly gracious, yet confident man. He possesses an air of pride and nose-to-the-grindstone work ethic. He is, as Mr. Washington often portrays, the model of integrity.
He sent me off to do some busy work, which is all the school has for me right now, with a book and a pencil. Unfortunately, as he noticed very suddenly, the pencil was dull. Now, it's not like there are pencil sharpeners in every room, or for that matter, anywhere.
He took the pencil, and very deliberately searched through his desk drawer, not hurrying, but not dawdling either. Finding a small razor blade, he closed the desk drawer and, collecting the shavings on his lap, proceeded to silently shave off the wood on the pencil. Every stroke was measured but not in any way slow, and he moved with a wonderful rhythm that showed how occupied he was with doing correctly the task at hand. It was clear that he was going to do this job right, and the rest of the world could wait. This was not done in a spiteful manner, but in a very calm, collected way of saying "This matters."
He handed the pencil back to me, perfectly sharpened, with a big smile on his face as if to say "This is how Mozambicans do it". I never thought I'd be entranced by sharpening a pencil, but it's novelty is mainly due to the fact that much of the Western world is in such a rush - and for what? So an electric sharpenr gives you instant satisfaction - whatever happened to putting a concerted effort and pride into all of your work, no matter how small the task? Do we really have that much to do?
Maybe this is what truly bothers me about the embrogada, which is to say that many Americans just throw their laundry into a washer and press a button - so they see the embrogada as merely a substitute for this convenience. I believe I could pay one if I saw that SHE took pride in the laundry as if it were her own, and I were giving her the opportunity to do the job the right way. Maybe I'll watch her next time.
And maybe, through her, I'll feel less isolated.
Let there be peace in North Korea, Iraq and the rest of the world. Please.
Peace
John
